Luna's Love Life



The lady leader of the Lunatacs is no stranger to scandal either, although she is admittedly a little better at avoiding the cameras.  Still, if she was that good, there would be no article, and we at the Inquirer can assure you that little Luna has been involved in her share of strange relations.

Luna's first date after establishing herself on Third Earth was the samurai Hachiman.  This was quite a surprising match, especially since the Lunatacs had taken great delight in abusing him and stealing his sword in the past, but Luna insisted that she had changed and Hachiman believed her, and took her out for a nice candlelight dinner in a cave. 

One might question the sense of trusting in the sincerity of a known criminal, but Hachiman is not known for being the best judge of character.  One only has to consider all the times Mumm-Ra lied to him that he swallowed hook, line, and sinker.  It almost makes you pity the sap for being so gullible. 

The lusty little Lunatac leader got the samurai drunk on some extra-strong sake, and proceeded to have her way with him after helping herself to his sword.  (Yes, the Thunder-cutter... although we suspect that "other" sword was probably involved too.)  Unfortunately for Luna and even more so Hachiman, this date took place in a cave that Alluro and Chilla had gone to in the hopes of having a private discussion.  Upon entering, the irritated Chilla iced Hachiman on sight, effectively ruining the moment between the lunar woman and the samurai and bringing their relationship to an icy end.

Not long after her relationship with Hachiman ended, Mumm-Ra was seen propositioning Luna one evening in DarkSide.

Reportedly Luna jumped at the chance to spend a night with the Ever-Living, especially after what she had heard about his immortal stamina from Alluro.

When asked to comment, Mumm-Ra's eyes glowed a warning scarlet and he said, "I'll try anything once.  Besides, that's one woman I don't think Lion-Ho or any mortal would have the stomach for."

When she found out that Mumm-Ra used her for sex, and in such an unflattering light at that, Luna was livid and vowed to get even with him.  Mumm-Ra retorted that he'd worry when she could look him in the eye and say that.

Luna's longtime companion and often silent partner Amok had only one statement for the whole fiasco.  "Luna's boyfriends no give me candy."

It seems that Luna then realized how much she had been neglecting her steed, and she offered to find him a toy to cheer him up.  She also admitted that she loved any excuse to use her high tech glowing lasso on an unwilling partner for some naughty games, especially if it involved someone she didn't like.  (Picture of "Cowgirl Luna" graciously provided by Agent Cassio2x)

Ride 'em, Luna!

When she asked Amok what he wanted, she asked at lunchtime and he said "turkey". 

That unfortunately led to the circumstances that spawned this disturbing photograph...

Vultureman was none too pleased about being roped by Luna and then manhandled by Amok.  Sources say he cawed for some time about how he never gets any respect and he was not going to be "Amok's bitch" since only Luna was fully qualified for that role.

That only got poor Vultureman in deeper (or should we say Amok, perhaps?) and the brute Lunatac spent the rest of the afternoon having his way with the hapless Mutant.

When asked to comment, all Amok said was, "Mmm, tastes like chicken."

Once Amok's needs were properly tended to, Luna set out to sate her lusty appetites again.  She decided that the best way to mix finding companionship with exacting revenge was to steal Chilla's young Thundercat lover WilyKat for herself. 

WilyKat had an agenda of his own, and readily succumbed to Luna's advances, even throwing in some flattery about how exciting older women were when they were "way, way older, like by a hundred years or so."
 

Unfortunately for WilyKat, that comment got him thrashed as opposed to laid. 

Luna had Amok drag WilyKat back to the Circus Train, where she tossed him in a cell where Bragg had already been stupid enough to lock himself in.  When Bragg asked for the keys, Luna laughed viciously said the invisible oil fell on them.  WilyKat meanwhile began looking for the invisible oil bottle.

Shortly after the fiasco with WilyKat, Luna decided to go for the gold, or in this case the red, by seducing Lion-O of the Thundercats.  She was unaware of his sexually ambitious plan to boink every willing party on Third Earth, and fancied herself quite the seductress when she lured him into a secluded area and played "helpless" to win over his sensitive side. 

When asked about his earlier comment, Mumm-Ra only shook his head and said that "even the Ancient Spirits of Evil can be wrong sometimes."  Reportedly he was both impressed and disgusted that a mortal man could survive a night with Luna, especially as she's a "screamer" by his account.

The above picture was taken in secret by a very well camouflaged agent, one who carefully bribed Amok with a super-size bag of Snickers prior to loading the camera.  Luna wove a story about negotiating peace between her people and his, and taking a cue from Queen Willa, forged some "diplomatic ties" of their own that evening.

By the next morning, however, the romance was gone along with the lion when Luna woke up.  Furious that she had been used again, Luna then swore off relationships altogether saying she'd had enough of the whole thing to last a lifetime.  When asked what she would do if she felt lonely, she only patted Amok and said he was the perfect man.  He was strong, quiet, and didn't complain as long as she kept him fed.  As for her other "needs", Luna only waved her crop dismissively and said, "If he can build one that doesn't explode, Vultureman can make something to take care of that."
 


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