Lefty MSTs Stone Cold!

>Subj: THUNDERCATS SHOULD DIE
>Date: 12/6/98 5:48:46 PM Eastern Standard Time
>From: stonecold_jr01@yahoo.com (Justin Sonnentag)

MIKE: I smell lame WWF Fan.
TOM: Oh, great... he's probably hacking this e-mail out from somewhere in central Alabama.

>To: Cheeezey@aol.com
>HI LOSSSSSSER,

CROW: It's Jim Carrey!
TOM: Now that his 15 minutes of fame are up, Jim Carrey has taken to writing puerile flames.

>DON'T YOU HAVE ANYTHING BETTER TO DO THEN DEVOTE YOUR FUCKING LIVE TO USING A >DILDO AND WATCHING A LION SWINGING HIS STUPID THING AROUND CALLING PEOPLE HO'S.

MIKE: FEAR ME! I WRITE WITH ALL CAPS AND SPELL HORRIBLY!
TOM: He wishes he had a dildo. He wants the used ones so he can lick the cream off of them.
MIKE: Ewww, Tom!

>YOU SOULD TRY WWF THATS COOL. ALL YOU FUCKING THUNDERCATS FANS WILL BURN IN HELL
>AND DIE.

CROW: [StoneCold] AND ALL DAT' JAZZ.
MIKE: Blake?

>ALL OVER AGAIN. PIECE OF ADVICE QUIT YOUR WINING THAT THEY TOOK OFF THE
>THUNDERCATS. AGAIN.

TOM: [StoneCold] Allow me to expound on the present topic. I am a lamer flamer, who had nothing better to do that darken your bandwith with my childish and poorly written rants. I suck, so bite me.

>THERE IS A REASON TO THAT. THEY SUCK. LETS SEE HAS WWF BEEN TAKEN
>OFF NO.

MIKE: [StoneCold] It contributes to the general well-being of life in Evergreen, Alabama!
CROW: Somebody must have taken off his comma key.
TOM: And his shift key, apparently.

>THUNDERCATS YES.

ALL: LAMER TROLLS NO!

> I THING IT'S ABOUT TIME THEY ARE OFF THE AIR. I WILL GO TO
>CARTOON NETWORK AND PERSONALLY BURN THE TAPES.

MIKE: [StoneCold] That way, I can fulfill my fantasy of being anally raped by a 6'5" 260 lb. felon in prison!
TOM: Wow!

>BY THE WAY DON'T GIVE ME THIS SHIT

CROW: [StoneCold] I want the kind of shit I can *eat*!
MIKE: CROW!

>ABOUT THAT I SHOULDN'T BE HERE. I TYPED IN THUNDER CATS TO BRING UP THE SNOWMOBILE.
>AND IT GIVES ME THIS CRAP.

TOM: [StoneCold] And instead of pushing the "Back" button and leaving, I stayed and flamed the page like a retarded monkey on PCPs.
CROW: He's gotta be from Alabama.

>I HOPE YOU ALL BURN IN HELL WATCHING THE FAGET CATS. ESPALLY TYGRA. YES I READ THE
>OTHER VOLTRON LETTER. VOLTRON SUCKS.

MIKE: [StoneCold] Except for Pidge. I want to have its baby!

>SO DOES ANY OTHER WINING CRYING CARTOON.

TOM: Like Captain Planet?
CROW: Wining... crying... maybe he means "Dallas".

>WATCH SOMETHING REAL
>WATCH WWF

MIKE: Vegetate in your dank, musty trailer and crush beer cans on your head!

>BYE YOU FAGS.

TOM: [grandmotherly voice] Watch your mouth, or I'll have a mind to wash it out with soap!

>PS. TAKE YOUR PAGES OFF . THERE A EYE SORE.

CROW: Where a eye sore?
MIKE: Well, his grammar and capital letters make my "eyes sore".

>Subj: Re: THUNDERCATS SHOULD DIE
>Date: 12/6/98 7:31:41 PM Eastern Standard Time
>From: stonecold_jr01@yahoo.com (Justin Sonnentag)
>To: Cheeezey@aol.com

TOM: Here we go again...

>DID I HURT YOU CRY BABY FEELIGS.

MIKE: I think the only hurting is our sides... from laughing at this.
CROW: I can't believe someone who can't spell "feelings" insulted somoene else.

>CRY CRY :(

TOM: He's sad.
MIKE: I'll say.

>PEICE OF ADVICE FOR YOU.

CROW: [StoneCold] Type with *both* hands, unlike me!
MIKE: Ow!
TOM: That might explain it, he could have gummed up his Caps Lock.

>TAKE OUT YOUR THUNDERCAT MAGS. AND USE YOUR FUCKING DILDO.

CROW: Kids! Be like Stone Cold!
TOM: Maybe if he took the dildo out, he wouldn't be so uptight.

>BY THE WAY I'M NOT GAY LIKE YOU.

MIKE: [StoneCold] I'm gay like Scott Thompson!

>THUNDERCATS YOUR A HOOOOOOOOOOO

CROW: That's one 'o'!
TOM: So he basically addressed cartoon characters?
MIKE: Pretty much.

-------end MST --------

MIKE: It's flame time!!

>FIRST OF ALL WHAT THE HELL IS MSTed WHY DON'T YOU TRY TO EXPAND ON THAT.

TOM: Helping you make yourself look bad?

>LIKE IN ENGLISH. NEXT YOU THUNDERCAT FANS ARE PATHEDICT.

CROW: Edict of Trent?
TOM: I think he called Thundercat fans a sort of religious pathologist.
MIKE: Huh?

>ALL YOU CAN DO IS CORRECT ME ON MY GRAMMAR. HOO I'M SO SCARED. NOT.

MIKE: [StoneCold] Dude, like I'm *so* NOT scared!
CROW: No, he's from the South.
MIKE: [StoneCold] Tarnation! I isn't scared one bit!

>GEE YOU CAN'T EVEN STAND OF FOR THE PUSSY FAGET CATS.

TOM: Who are they?
CROW: Josie and the Pussycats?

>ALL YOU DO IS MORE COMPLAINING. OH YOU MISSPELLED A WORD,

MIKE: [StoneCold] Shame on them, picking on a kindergarten drop-out!

>HO THEY TOOK OF THUNDERCATS AGAIN, HO MY DILDO IS AT MY FRIENDS
>HOUSE.

CROW: [StoneCold] Excuse me for a sec, I have to go to get it.
TOM: Zing!

>GEE CAN YOU EVER QUIT YOU GOD DAM INFERNAL WHINING.

TOM: [StoneCold] Cut that out, brother cousin!!

>IF I HERE ONE MORE COMPLAINING ABOUT SOMETHING I THINK I WILL
>SHOOT MY SELF.

MIKE: Oh, no! Who will be left to watch WWF, buy Skoal and take his sister to the
high school prom?
CROW: He'd go to the mobile home in the sky...

>DON'T WORRY I FOUND THE SPELL CHECK, SO QUIT YOU WHINING.

CROW: [StoneCold] OR I'LL YELL MORE VAPID THREATS!

>SINCE YOU STUPID THUNDERCAT FANS CAN'T DO ANYTHING ELSE BUT WINE

TOM: Don't some of them drink beer too?
MIKE: Looks like StoneCold is doing something else... like crack.
CROW: Or his mother...
MIKE: CROW...

>WHY DO YOU EVEN BOTHER TO HAVE A PAGE.

MIKE: Because it's fun?
TOM: Hey, everyone does like they want... these Thundercat fans make webpages, while
you beat off to Rocky Maivia posters.
CROW: Ick...

>I MEAN YOU CAN'T EVEN DEFEND THE PUSSYCATS I AM A HOOOO.

CROW: [StoneCold] I walk down Simpson Street in Atlanta, and flaunt my stuff!
TOM: This guy really makes it too easy sometimes...

>I ADVICE YOU TO TAKE THE HORRIBLE HORRIBLE CRYBABY PAGE OFF. BY THE
>WAY FOR THE RECORD I DON'T LOOK AT PORN

MIKE: [StoneCold] I look at *horses*!
BOTS: EWWW!

>SO TELL YOUR OTHER WHINING FRIENDS THAT.  I HAVE BETTER THINGS LIKE MY
>GIRLFRIEND.

TOM: [StoneCold] And the clap!
CROW: Hey, Stone Cold... ever notice that your girlfriend has large hands and a pronounced
Adam's apple?

>AND WWF IS REAL YOU CAN TELL WHILYKAT

MIKE: "Whi"? He's a cartoon character.
TOM: StoneCold here has a problem with reality, I think...

>THAT. OR SHOULD I CALL HIM PUSSYKAT.

CROW: Faster, Pussycat! Kill! Kill!

>PS. I LOVE HOW I WAS SWAMPED WITH LETTERS. HA HA HA I ONLY GOT ONE OTHER
>LETTER. HOO I AM SO SCARED.

TOM: [StoneCold] I'm scared! Nobody cared about my silly rants!
MIKE: This guy's preoccupation with HOO scares me.
CROW: He was probably born in the bus terminal.
MIKE: Ouch!

>Subj: Re: THUNDERCATS SHOULD DIE
>Date: 12/10/98 1:11:18 AM Eastern Standard Time
>From: stonecold_jr01@yahoo.com (Justin Sonnentag)
>To: Cheeezey@aol.com

TOM: Doesn't this loser ever give up?

>WELL IT LOOKS LIKE YOU GIVE UP BECAUSE YOU DIDN'T E-MAIL ME RIGHT AWAY LIKE
>YOU ALWAYS DO.

MIKE: [StoneCold] Screw those people with lives and jobs!

>TAKE OFF YOU THUNDERCATS PAGE AND TELL ALL THE OTHER THUNDERCAT PAGES
>TO COME OFF.

CROW: So she's Lord Cheeezey the Puppet Master?
TOM: [StoneCold] After you do that, I want you to reestablish the Confederacy, buy Microsoft,
and ask Sally Sue to go to Mobile with me tomorrow night... for some "wrestling"!

BECAUSE STONECOLD SAID SO.

MIKE: Well, not StoneCold, but an ignorant redneck using his name.
TOM: [StoneCold] Ain't I just the corn chitlin'est coolest?

------------------------------end MST 2------------------------

>OH NO YOU MSTED ME I AM SOOOOOOO SCARED (not)

TOM: Oh, no! That means he wasn't scared into writing coherently!

>YeS I KnOw HoW tO uSe ThE FuCkInG cApSlOcK kEy.

MIKE: It's Torgo!!
CROW: [Torgo] ThE maSter DoEs Not APprOve oF ReDNeckS.
TOM: So where's the "FuckingCapslockKey"?
CROW: It's F10.

> I JUST LIKE TO ANNOY YOU WITH IT.  THERE I
>USED LOWER CASE ARE YOU HAPPY NOW.

TOM: [StoneCold] Next, I'll learn how to use question marks and commas!

> HERE LET ME TELL YOU WHAT'S WRONG
>WITH YOUR PAGE.

MIKE: [StoneCold] It doesn't suck!

>NUMBER 1 = It takes way to long to load up.  I thing I might get some
>Social Security by the time you page loads up.

CROW: So that's his "thing"... Social Security.
TOM: [Stonecold] Man, my 286AT can't handle this page!!

>NUMBER 2 = You are using AOL.

MIKE: Isn't the page on Simplenet?
TOM: Details, details...

>                                                        The world's most used service.

MIKE: What about McDonalds?
CROW: Isn't prostitution the world's most used service?

>                                                                                                                 Think a
>bit,  try some other company.  Like GeoCities.  Your page might load
>up quicker.

TOM: [StoneCold] Plus it will crash pages with annoying pop-ups! It's a win-win situation!!

>NUMBER 3 = There is no order to your page.  Everything is looks like
>you just put together in a hurry.  (TAKE YOUR TIME)

MIKE: [StoneCold] Like when I bop my bologna in front of WWF Raw... I just take
it easy...
CROW: Thank you, Mike...

>NUMBER 4 = The Color scheme is out of wack.  Try using basic colors.

MIKE: [StoneCold] We haven't gotten to complementaries in art class yet!
TOM: Next, Stoney here learns shapes.

>NUMBER 5 = TRY a thing called FRAMES.  They are usually nice and
>organize your page.  It would look less junky.

CROW: Too bad there aren't frames for his writing.
MIKE: Frames: Making pages look less junky since... 1992.
TOM: [caveat announcer] Those without Netscape or IE need not apply.

>NUMBER 6 = (THIS IS MY suggestions)  It should haven't been about
>THUNDERBRATS.

MIKE: That's good, it isn't.
CROW: So the other suggestions weren't his?
TOM: [StoneCold] Make it about Chyna! RRROWL!

>There I actually took my time to give you some good advice.  Try using
>it.

TOM: Kids! Be like Stoney!
MIKE: [Steve Austin] Be an annoying flamer troll with nothing better to do! Because
one of Stone Cold's annoying fans said so!

>NOT THE WORLDS GREATEST FLAME,

CROW: ... not the world's greates flamer...

> IN FACT IT'S KIND OF NICE.  I'LL TRY HARDER TO BE MEAN NEXT TIME.

MIKE: [StoneCold] I'll harm you! I'll give you such a pinch!
TOM: This kid must get snicker-snagged daily in school.

>YOURS ALWAYS,

MIKE: That was probably "Up yours"...

IHATETHUNDERCATS

CROW: Awww... isn't he mature.
TOM: I want a name like that! Call me "IHATELAMERFLAMERS".
MIKE: Heh... let's go!

<end>

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