Whiddaw's Two Cents

He's not even worth two cents. But, BOY he IS a target of MiSTs. Ramza, Delita and Balmafuma will be MiSTing this one. They are from FFT. Enjoy!


<<... I found this in my mailbox two days after the first flame:>>

DELITA: Gods, I pity you.

BALMAFUMA: It must have stank up the whole mailbox!

RAMZA: I hear that Whiddaw is very bad.

DELITA: He's only the worst troll on the internet! It's pretty sad if people from a Midevel world know about him.

<<Subj: God Dang You Suck!>>

DELITA: Wow! That was absolutly brilliant. Oh! The beauty! The poetry! He's a Rembrandt! He's the guy from The Shawshank Redemption.

BALMAFUMA:(hands Delita a handkerchif).

DELITA: What's this for!?

BALMAFUMA: To wipe the sarcasm that's oozing from your mouth!

DELITA:Oh. (Wipes his mouth). Thanks!

<<Date: 9/4/98 5:48:07 PM Eastern Daylight Time
From: whiddaw@mci2000.com (whiddaw)
To: Cheeezey@aol.com
>>

RAMZA: Why do flames always have to happen to such cool and smart people!?

BALMAFUMA: Because cool and smart people are quite good at dealing with stupidity!

<<Hi,It's WHIDDAW Here......To Tell You That You Suck! >>

BALMAFUMA: Is Cheezey supposed to be insulted by this?

RAMZA/DELITA: NO!

BALMAFUMA: Okay.

RAMZA: She'll need an oxygen mask after she finishes laughing!

<<I Mean......Man.....ANIME!!!>>

DELITA: You mean nothing, Whiddaw!

RAMZA: Maybe he was spasming while he wrote this.

BALMAFUMA: Maybe he was using one hand.

(Ramza and Delita snicker).

<< Look It Up Damn It!>>

RAMZA: Anime: Japanese Animation that deals with subject matters that Whiddaw is either too young, too stupid or too small minded to understand.

<< It Is Superman Of Cartoons Buddy! >>

DELITA: WHAT?

RAMZA: Geez, I didn't know that Anime wore a red cape.

DELITA: Guess it's able to leap tall buildings in a single bound.

RAMZA: Someone should throw Whiddaw off a tall building!

<<And You Don't Like It!!!! >>

BALMAFUMA: Is this an accusation? If I'm not mistaken, Cheezey likes Thundercats. It is Anime. So's Voltron.

<<Man Your A Jackass! Stupid Motherfucker! >>

DELITA: All inspired by E.E. Cummings.

RAMZA: Cummings? Er, maybe he was inspired by a different Cummings.

BALMAFUMA: Oh my God, Ramza! (She bursts into laugher. Delita eventually joins).

DELITA: That was a good one, Ramza. BWAHAHAAHAH!

<<You Don't Like Voltron!! Or Sailor Moon!!! >>

BALMAFUMA: Here we go again. So what if she doesn't. People don't have to like everything that's Anime.

RAMZA: It's not like Cheezey has to answer to this guy!

<<Thundercats Suckass! >>

ALL: YOU SUCKASS, WHIDDAW!

DELITA: We apologize for sinking to this bacteria's level. However, gutter talk is all this guy understands.

<<I Mean..... You Need My Big Truck Shoved So Far Up Your Ass!!!>>

(All three of them gape in astonishment).

RAMZA: So, that's what he's been saying all along?

DELITA: These are the days when I am glad that I do not read minds.

<<Tigra....HAHAHAHAHAHA! >>

DELITA: Was that supposed to be funny?

<<The Voltron Force Or The Sailor Scouts Could Kick His Ass! >>

BALMAFUMA: Well, they can kick YOUR ass, that's for sure!

<<And I Think Thay All Look Like BIG FATASS LIONS! >>

ALL: NOBODY CARES WHAT YOU THINK!

DELITA: Nobody cares if you live or die, Whiddaw!

RAMZA: I bet Whiddaw's a repressed fat ass! Or a repressed Thundercats fan!

<<Simba Is A Motherfucker!>>

RAMZA: I'm sure that Simba is really insulted.

DELITA(Simba): Since Whiddaw called me a motherfucker, life has lost all meaning.

BALMAFUMA: I can smell the sarcasm from here.

DELITA: I'm glad you know!

<<The Thundercats Are ALL MOTHERFUCKERS!>>

BALMAFUMA: What an astounding volcabulary!

DELITA: Oh! So my sarcasm rubbed off a bit, hasn't it?

BALMAFUMA: Um, yea.

<< I Now Work For A Deadly Spy Service!!! >>

ALL: BWAAHHAHAHAHHAHHHAAHHAAH!!!!

DELITA: HAHHAAHA! I'm sure they'd want you to say that. BWAHAHHAHA!

RAMZA: I need oxygen! HAHAHHAHHH!

<<So Stand Back! And I Also Work For Simplenet!!! >>

ALL(Still Laughing).

BALMAFUMA: Simplenet only hires those who can read and write.

DELITA: You, Whiddaw, do not qualify!

(The trio resumes their laughter).

<<I Will Delete Your Account Unless You Put Some Anime Up!!! >>

RAMZA: I'm petrified! Really!

DELITA: My sarcasm is contagious!

BALMAFUMA: Thank God!

<<See You!>>

ALL: NO!

<<whiddaw@mci2000.com>>

RAMZA: It's proably gone now!

DELITA: Yup. He's violated the world with his filth.

BALMAFUMA: At any rate, let's get out of here!

(The trio runs from the theater).

The end.


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