using characters from Final Fantasy Tactics
<<Date: Sat, 15 Aug 1998 16:45:58 -0400
From: Leslie Ullom <lullom@learninglink.org>
To: bigcheeze34@hotmail.com
Subject: God, you suck...>>
MALAK: Are you saying that God sucks!? He will smite you!
MUSTADIO: Er, you don't believe in God.
MALAK: Oh yea. I forgot.
<<Okay, you just suck. I'm serious here, man.>>
RAFA: How serious? Like a heart attack?
MALAK: As death?
MUSTADIO: As a 700 pound man who just ate a big old can of beans in front of a gas tank!?
(Rafa and Malak look at Mustadio).
RAFA: Now that's serious.
<<Voltron is a badass cartoon, and more importantly it's anime (look it up)<<
MUSTADIO: Anime. Japanese cartoons that are often more mature than this lamer flamers idea of anime.
<<which makes it vastly superior to any American cartoon--aside from the Batman and Superman cartoons. >>
RAFA: What? Okay, we all know that anime is great stuff, but how can it be inferior to Batman and Superman?
MALAK: This guy's just nitpicking his nose, that's all.
<<There's no way ANYTHING about Thundercats is cooler than anything--period. >>
MUSTADIO: This flame is a redundant flame.
<<They're a bunch of freakish fat ASSES!!! >>
RAFA: FAT!? Algus is fatter than they are!
MUSTADIO: This guy is a freak. Maybe he's a thousand pounds.
MALAK: Tons of fun!
<< They're monstrous to look at, and they're big fat THINGS!! >>
MALAK: Fat things?! I never heard of fat objects? What color are toilets in this guy's world?
<<Thundercats suck ass, especially that dick Tigra. >>
RAFA: It's TYGRA! You can't even spell the name right!
<<I mean, 'a' is a FEMININE ending!!! >>
RAFA: Not always! Some male characters have a's in their name. Like Ramza and Delita.
MUSTADIO: Of course they do seem a bit feminine. *snicker*.
<<I know you can't tell who's male or female on that show by looking at 'em, so the names should kinda clue you in. >>
MALAK: So, Jaga is female? And Mumm-Ra?
RAFA: And Godzilla?
MUSTADIO: What about people like Monkian? Would they be sexless?
<<He should be named TigrO, not TigrA...he has a fucking girl's name. >>
MALAK: What about my name? Guess it's sexless, huh?
RAFA: This guy is a fool! There's lots of unisex names out there!
MUSTADIO: Well, Wilykit doesn't have an "A" in her name, so is she male of female?
RAFA: She's female and this guy is stupid!
<<The whole show suck giant ass! >>
MUSTADIO: Fee! Fi! Fo! Fum! I smell the blood of a lamer flamer!
<<YOU DESERVE TO BE ASS-FUCKED BY A BULLDOZER FOR SLANDERING VOLTRON AND LIKING THUNDERCATS!!!!>>
RAFA: Hey, keep your sex toys to yourself!
MALAK: This guy has the brains of a bulldozer!
MUSTADIO: Maybe he wants to be ass-f*cked by a bulldozer!
(All of them laugh).
The end.
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