“Oh, Liono!”

By RD Rivero

February 10, 2002

 

**final version**

 

He rolled over and lay flat on his back, hair disheveled, body weak and sore muscle and bone.  Fluttering his eyes open he looked to the right, to the figure that slept soundly at his side.  Shocked and disturbed, he shriveled and covered himself in the mess of linens that had partly fallen on the floor.

It was unnatural.  Yup.  Yes sire-e bob, it was unnatural.  Totally Jagga unapproved.

How could it have happened?  How did it get started, anyway?  Oh, he knew the ‘mechanics’ quite well, after all, the past few years had been a roller-coaster of unwholesome education.  But still!

He was Liono, Lord of the Thundercats, bethrowed to WileyKit.  She was Purrsia, cheer-leader, married and worse, she was the defacto evil accomplice of RD Rivero.

Nothing good would come of it.  Nothing.

He tried to shake off the on-rush of dread that then clouded his mind.  It wasn’t much dread, to be honest.  Certainly, he told himself, it wasn’t as if things in the fandom had ever been normal.  Breathing in space, Berbils, Mandora and just about whatever else sprung out of Overgaurd’s pen.  Yet the insanity of the past decade, the past couple of years in particular, was simply too much to bear.  Vicious monsters and evil beyond imagination weren’t anything new, but now they actually had a fighting chance to win.  Sure, there was always a sort of naughty innuendo in the past, but now little was left to the imagination.

And poor Tygra.  He couldn’t complain, really, he was well-treated by most of the fanfiction authors.  He had had great leading roles and even as a second-banana he would usually come out OK.  Maybe not the comedies, but no one paid attention to the comedies- or so he tried to convince himself- but Tygra.  Yeeesh!

“Where is that tiger?” he wondered.

“Hey, you over there?” the female lion asked, her voice calling from a distance, a vast chasm that separated them.  “You alright?”

“Um, yeah,” he answered.

It was the pre-morning hour and, in the twilight that announced the coming of the day, he fidgeted nervously.  Usually, at about that time, he’d fondle himself quietly, lest Snarf be-

“Wait a minute!” he thought aloud, “I don’t- oh,” he stopped.

Purrsia crept to his side and lay her head atop his exposed chest.  One hand groped his pecs while the other roamed beneath the sheets and titillated his flesh, explored the dimples that demarcated his bulged muscles.

“Mmmm, yum!”  she purred into his ear as she molested his upper- and lower- body.

Her voice brought him back from the great gulf of void that was his mind at work to more, pressing, issues.

“What did we do last night?  I mean,” he struggled with the words, “isn’t this wrong or something?”

“My soft lovely,” she said, her attention focused elsewhere-

Liono jerked under her weight in shock as he felt her touch his Viagra place.

“But you’re married!”  he sat up, forcing her off of him.

“Oh, oh, little Liono’s getting frisky!” she teased, her hold unbroken from her most favorite spot.

“Lady,” he eased himself out of her grip and wrapped the sheets tight around his waist.

Purrsia, too, sat up but, as naked as he was, she didn’t bother to cover herself.  Coyly, she insisted on having her way with his manhood, despite the fact that he resisted and tried, desperately, to add more folds of cloth between it and her eager fingers.

“Lady, come on!” he kept an eye to the door and whispered:  “What if he finds us?”

“Now you know he doesn’t like Cat’s Lair, he’d never come over.”  She rubbed her bare breasts up and down his biceps.  “Besides, he doesn’t care!”

Over the past ten years all sorts of things- inappropriate things- have happened to the Thundercats.  But the weird events weren’t just limited to the original cast members.  New authors and new characters would appear and disappear all the time, without prompt or warning.  He and the rest of the cannon inhabitants had no choice but to muck through the evolving plotlines until enough back story and detail were revealed to let them connect the dots.

He was in a story and from the looks of it he gathered it was a pornographic story.  But it was only the beginning and he had not yet caught on.  It usually took him a page or two to get up to speed.  For the moment, though, if it was a sex-fic, he might as well get the most out of it.

He laughed and released his grip around the makeshift loincloth.

Purrsia draped her arms around his neck and clung to him like a chain.  “You sure aren’t acting like yourself.  I guess you’re too tired, too pooped.”

“I, well, um,” Liono held her gingerly.  “How long have you been here?”

She laughed and leaned in closer.  “Silly lion, I’ve been here all night of course!  Was it so good you lost all memory of it?  Or is that just your LFS talking?”

“LFS?”

She giggled.  “We had wild, roaring, romping animal sex all night long!  Yeah!”  She threw her arms up as if to cheer. “I think Panthro was listing, I kept hearing him, if you know what I mean,” she poked his ribs with her elbow.

It was a different sort of story, that was for sure.  He was more accustomed to the slow start and gradual build up.  The sex was kept to the middle or end.  It never started with sex.  It never started immediately after the sex.  That was just-

Just-

“So, you liked it?” he smiled, his train of thought derailed.

“It was so good!  Oh, that thing you did with your knees.  Dreamy!”  She purred into his ear and licked his cheek.  “I knew they were wrong about you,” she managed to- rather, he let her- ease her hand beneath the sheets, “I knew you were a sex god.”

He relaxed and took a deep breath.  Excited by the possibility of the torrid love affair and pure-sex relationship- very uncommon for an animated character such as himself- it would have been foolish to pass up the opportunity.  He drew back the pile of sheets he had used to cover himself and looked down to see her hands fondling and tugging his flesh.

All the times before, when he had been used in pornos, there was a period of ‘courtship’ when he would first meet and then get to know the girl- or boy- poor Tygra.  Anyway, the wanking of his monkey took time to get to so he was surprised and very, very-

And then she stopped.

“What’s wrong?” he panted.  “What’s the matter?” he begged.

“I was just about to ask you that,” she said, whipping his member around her finger.  “Don’t tell me it’s not responding,” she winked, “it was working just fine last night.”

He noticed it only then, only too late- he was excited, he could feel it, but he could not show it.  It was a new low and even he had enough brain cells left in his head to know what it meant.

She sighed and teased his mane.  “That’s OK, big boy, after last night, I can understand if you need to, recuperate.”  She kissed his cheek and got off the bed.

“Hey, my sword is growing!”  He felt himself course longer and harder through the folds of the sheets.  She turned to him and winked.  He got hard at once and pushed off the linens, exposing his pulsating meat-

“Hehehe, you joker!”

He looked down.  “No!  It was hard, I swear it was hard!”

She giggled.

 “By Jagga!”

Yes, it only meant one thing it was becoming clearer and clearer.

“I’ve never had this problem before,” he stood and met her at the door.

The female lion donned on a robe she had flung across a chair last night and opened the door.  Panthro fell into the room asleep, shorts around his ankles, hands buried between his legs.  A stain of some sort adorned the floor beside him.

“Same time, same place?”  she hugged him oblivious to the snoring Thundercat half in and half out of the room.

“Same time, different place,” he massaged her back.  Just the thought of more sex made the blood in his loins boil.  He stirred, his aching flesh throbbing, brushing against the roughness of her robe.  “Can you feel that?” he asked softly.

“Feel what?”  She let go of his waist and tweaked his fur-covered nipples.  “Where do you want to do it tonight?”

“Outside-”

“Public sex!”  she teased his lips with a kiss.  “You’re so kinky!”

“I’ll take the Thunder Tank, I’ll say it has something to do with the Berbil village.  They’ll let me go and we can have the whole night alone.”  He cupped her breast and salivated, pressing himself on her as he groped and fondled.  He thought he was on the verge but- no matter how aroused he got, no matter how great the feelings in his manhood, he was limp as a five year old.

With a little squeeze to his little weenie, she kissed and parted company.

The kittens, who were peeking from their door, shot out of their room and pranced past Liono- the bratish pair pointed and laughed at his ‘situation.’

“Wow,” WileyKit exclaimed, “I thought it grew bigger as you got older.”

“When I grow up, I don’t want to be hung like Liono,” her brother lamented.

“Oh don’t worry,” she nudged him with her elbow, “you’ve got him beat!”

“Hey!” he blushed, “you promised you wouldn’t tell!”  She winked and scurried down the hall.  “Wait for me!”  He rushed on after her.

“Kids,” Liono shook his head and retreated into his room.

Tygra, smelling like mental hospital disinfectant, appeared within.  Wrapping his whip in his hands, he smiled at the youth.

“You!”  Liono jumped in a moment of unexpected shock.  Oddly, he made no attempt to cover himself.  “And how long have you been in here?”

“All night,” the red-tiger said, matter-of-factly.  “Rowl!  Man, what you did with your hips!”

The lion peered at a wet spot between the striped-one’s legs.

“I almost creamed myself!”

A large, wet spot.

Liono’s eyes widened.

“You and Purrsia had the best sex I’ve ever had!”

“That, oh,” he looked at his own crotch.  Soggy and limp like day-old cornflakes.  “Tygra,” he grabbed the tiger’s shoulders and led him to a corner near his closet.  “Tygra, I’m in a porno.”

“Oh, good for you!” he hugged the maned-one excitedly.  “And I get to watch!”

“Well, we’ve got two problems.”  He looked around, careful that no one was watching, listening.  “I can’t get it up.  Purrsia and I are supposed to have more sex later tonight, but I can’t if it doesn’t work,” he pointed to his manhood.  “That and-”

“That’s a big problem by itself, Liono,” Tygra scratched his head.  “You didn’t break it, did you?”

“No- but that’s part of the second problem.”  He gulped and whispered into the red-striped one’s ear.  “I get the sinking feeling it’s an RD porno.”

“No, no!”  Now it was Silky Stripes who glared about the room.  “Don’t talk like that!  You’re probably just nervous or something.  This is your first porno where you actually had sex with a woman, that’s all.  You’re just having performance problems, that’s all.”

“You think so?”  Liono wasn’t exactly eager to be in a Rivero sex-fic himself.  Not after the stories he had heard from Pumyra.  And Bengali.  And the Kittens.  And Mandora.  And-

“That’s just it, we have to think positive.  We can’t just assume that he’s the cause of your soggy sausage.”

“It seems like he’s behind it, though, messing with my mind like this-”

Tygra shook his head uncontrollably and again grabbed Liono tightly, smothering his body upon the youth’s raw and ready heaving mass of hot manly-flesh.  “No, no, please, no!  If he’s here, if he’s controlling this, do you know what that means for me?  He’ll try to make me gay,” he cradled the lion’s head, “he’ll try to get me and Panthro together.”  He sighed and brought his hands down to the maned cat’s rear.  “That means I won’t get any action, or if I do, he’ll cut if off!”

“OK, OK,” he broke the tiger’s embrace.  “I’ll protect you, I promise, but, well, you’ve had so much more experience with him.  How can you tell if you’re in one of his stories?  What are the signs?”

Tygra glanced over at Panthro.  The tough, beat panther yawned and tossed on the floor.  He muttered something about it being Saturday and went back to sleep.  “We have to be careful,” he said as he opened the closet door and helped himself Liono in, “I’m sure if he’s here at all he won’t find us now.”  He paused to listen and make sure that indeed they were safe and shut the door.  “There are always signs but sometimes they’re hard to spot.  Are you attracted to me?”

“No!” Liono answered awkwardly.

“Shhh!  Are you attracted to the kittens?”

“Well,” he winced, “not really, no.”

“Hmmm, do you hear voices down there?”

“No.”

“Well, those are the usual signs.”  He rubbed his chin and smiled.  “Told you this wasn’t one of his stories.”

“But I can’t get it up!  I’m supposed to have sex with Purrsia and I’d like to enjoy it, but first I’d have to enjoy it.”

“You have to get through whatever’s blocking it,” the tiger counseled

“Could the sword help me?”

“This is fanfiction, not an episode-”

“Oh.”  He recalled that most of the authors had issues with an all-powerful, super weapon.  “That’s funny, when I woke up I had all of these ideas.  Complicated ideas about the stuff that was going but now I- I- what was I talking about?”

“Don’t know, it’s not like we listen to you, anyway.  When I have these kinds of problems, I know a perfect place to go for help.”  He draped an arm around the lion’s shoulder.  “You’ll love it!”

 

Smithers reclined on his half-back office chair, drooling and mumbling, lost in a state of fantasy all the while the phone on his desk rang and rang and rang.

Far removed from the doldrums of his life, he had transported himself to a level of orgasmic Nirvana.  In his mind he saw himself in a field of ankle-high grass, it was morning and the vibrant rays of the freshly-risen sun bathed his distant beloved in an aura of sparkling light.  Running, faster and faster, approaching, closer and closer, he reached out to touch the objected of his deepest, darkest desires-

“SMITHERS!” Zhie yelled from her office, from behind the closed door next to the sweaty, palpitating secretary.  “SMITHERS, PICK UP THE GOD-DAMNED PHONE NOW!  NOW!”

“Um, um” he adjusted his glasses, “yes, Mr. Burns, I mean, Doctor,” his glasses fumbled to the floor but since the pone was still ringing and since Zhie was still yelling at him he decided to do the smart thing- he picked up the receiver and cradled it on his shoulders as he reached down to grab the wire-frame spectacles.  “Hello, Dr. Zhie’s office.”

“Smithers,” Zhie said, that time over the phone, “you can call the next patient in.”  She disconnected before she could hear his customary ‘yes ma’am’ reply.

“Yes, ma’am.”  He stood- rather, he tried to stand- but quickly sat back.  Fresh out of his romp through hormone land, he had not had enough time to ‘return to normal’ as it were.  He gulped and adjusted his collar.  “Do as the doctor taught you,” he muttered to himself, closing his eyes, “think of women, you fool.  Think of breasts, exposed-”

“Hi,” Liono waved at him with a cautious smile, “hello, Mr.-”

“S-s-s-smithers,” he cowered.  The lion donned his usual uniform- half-nakedness- and the sight of the raw and chiseled masculine flesh undid whatever progress the breasts in his head had made with respect to his peculiar situation.  He wiped the sweat off of his brow with his sleeve.  “How can I help you?” he asked, trying to divert his eyes from the lion’s pecs, abs and- “oh my god!”

“I’ve been waiting here five hours.  I think I’m next,” he answered, unnerved that the strange man with the strange animation kept staring at him, “I’m Liono.”

“Of course you’re next,” he said, thumbing through the schedule.  He opened a drawer and fetched the Thundercat’s paperwork, smashing the side of his face on the desktop in the process.  “Just give this to the doctor when you enter,” he winced.  He handed the lion a jumble of papers, he hadn’t even bothered to check if all the documents were even the Thundercats.  “You can go, go in,” he pointed to the door next to him, hands shaking, sweat spraying.  “Yeah, she’s in there, waiting.”

Liono nodded and walked past the desk.  He had his back to the bizarre man when he heard a deep gasp and sigh.  He looked back.  The secretary turned away at once to shuffle a few objects on the table.  What a strange, strange man, he thought.  He wondered if that Smithers was the same secretary Tygra kept talking about while driving him to the office.  Just what sort of people does he hang out with, anyway?

He opened the door and stepped through-

“Oh my god!” Smithers moaned.  “And what am I going to do about you?”  He asked, peering at his crotch.  “Can’t you control yourself?”

“And what kind of fun would that be?” a voice came from his pronounced tent that bobbed up and down as it spoke.  Oddly, it had a familiar voice.  “‘Sides, was it my fault he was half naked?”

He thought back to a few moments ago, to the muscles, the flesh, the strong arms and muscles and bulging-

“Smithers, I need you!”

“Yes, Mr. Burns.  Coming, Mr. Burns!”

 

“So, you’re Liono,” Zhie said as she skimmed the clipboard of papers she’d been given.  “I meet you at last.”

“I get that a lot.”  He stood before her, next to her couch.  “I guess I’m famous in the fandom.”

“Yes, I’ve read so much, I mean, Tygra’s said so much about you.”  She placed the documents on the coffee table and pushed back her cheetah-spotted hair.

“Oh, good things, I hope,” he fidgeted with his mane nervously.  The doctor had an air of familiarity about her.

“Sorry,” she motioned him to recline on her couch, “doctor-patient confidentiality.”

He took the cue and got onto the sofa.  The wrong way.  She cleared her throat to indicate, non-verbally, that he should correct his position.  He thought nothing of it until she again cleared her throat, louder than before.  He turned back to see her glare at him.  “Are you alright, doc?”

The cheetah could not believe her eyes.  She crossed her arms.  “You’ve never been to a shrink before, have you?”

“No,” he sat up, “and please, right now shrink isn’t a word that-”

“Sorry about that,” she blushed and leaned forward to pat the couch on the spot where she wanted Liono to rest his head.  The Thundercat complied but instead of facing the ceiling, as her patients normally did, he faced the wall.  She sighed and figured that if it was the best she could get out of him, so be it.  “I’ve read your complaint,” she pulled out a fresh pad from under her chair, “according to you,” she eyed the clipboard on the coffee table, “you have a problem with your ‘jojo.’”

“Yes,” he answered, at once relieved and uncomfortable.  “It happened all so suddenly.”

“Could you tell me more about it,” she uncapped her pen.

“I can’t get it up!”  He wailed into his hands.  “It won’t respond.”

“You’re having problems achieving erection?”

“Doc, you don’t have to talk so dirty!”

She scribbled on her pad.

After a slight pause, she continued:  “How did you realize you couldn’t get it up?  What were the circumstances?”

“That’s the whole funny part-” he tossed around on the couch.  Its joints and springs groaned.

“It’s OK if you want to take your time.  We’ve got the whole session-”

“I’ll start from the beginning.”  He took a deep breath.  “I’m in a sex-fic.”  The cheetah raised her eyebrows.  “A porno.”  She jotted a few more notes.  “I’m not too sure who’s writing it just yet, but it’s obvious that I’m in a fanfic because none of this would be happening in a real episode of the show.”

“Of course,” she nodded, “but didn’t the Thundercats have a psychiatrist in its staff?”

“Ah, he was just a consultant.  He was there to make sure that naughty things didn’t make it into the episodes.  You know what I mean?”

“Too many images of pe- I mean, of jojos and hooters and things like that?”

“Exactly,” he said as he set his claw shield and SWORD OF OMENS on the floor.  “We never talked to him and we certainly never had problems getting it up either.”

“Because back then you were a character on an animated show for kids.  There was never any sex, despite the fact that you all ran around half-naked and looked at each other funny from time to time.”

“Yes!  Yes, that’s right.  It was all innocent.  Nothing was ever spoken.  It was all hush-hush.”  He rubbed his chin.  “Why, we never showed the bathrooms, ever.  We would have to line out outside the Port-A-Johns during the commercial breaks.”

“Anyway.  So you’re in a porno.  But how did you come to that conclusion?”

“I woke up naked with a lioness named Purrsia.”

“Hmmm,” she doodled on her pad.  “That’s usually a first sign.  Were you doing it then?”

“No.  But she told me that we had that night.”

“Your thing worked at night?”

“Yeah, I guess, but I have no memory of it.  She does.  And so does Tygra- he was in the room with us.”  She raised her eyebrows again.  “He was invisible.”

“Hmmm,” she made a note to herself about the tiger’s need for another checkup.

“And Panthro stayed up all night to listen to us from behind the door.”

“My, my.  Don’t the Thundercats have better things to do?  Like fight evil, bad guys?”

“Nah, most of the authors are in school so things are a bit slow.  I think Cheetara was on watch.  Anyway, when I woke up I was confused.  I had all these ideas about-”

“Ideas?  So how’s Cheetara doing?” she asked with a feral grin.

“Fine, I guess-”

“Did her rash clear up?”

“Rash?  I didn’t know-”

“Um, so you had ideas.  Sexual ideas?”

“Doc!  That’s just, I, that’s just, wrong.  Doc.  I was just wondering what the hell was going on.  And since Purrsia’s married I thought I was in big trouble.  But the guy doesn’t care.  Well, she wanted more and I was hesitant at first.  But as I began to realize I was in a porn, I thought, why not take advantage of the situation?”

“A ha-”

“What guy wouldn’t, right?”

“You engaged her in sex?”

“Doctor!” he raised his eyebrows.  “No, she was coming after me!  I couldn’t keep her hands off of it.  She wanted it, she needed it and I have to admit it was quite a turn on.  Most people don’t even think I have the equipment.  There’s this nasty rumor going around that I’m small in that department, so most of the girls pay attention to the other guys.  Kat, Panthro.”

“Ah,” she crossed out the naughty parts she had drawn on a rendition of naked Liono she had begun.

“But no matter what she did, or how excited I go, I just couldn’t get it up!”

“Were you nervous?  Anxious?”

“Not at all.  I was feeling fine, except for that.  But the weird thing was that after she stopped touching it, I could feel my thing get hard and when I showed it to her, my weenie was soft again.”

‘Wittle weenie,’ she wrote on her pad.  “Are you sure it was hard?”

“I was very, very sure!  I could feel it!”  He looked at his crotch.  “I was shocked when it was all droopy.  It happened again when I was kissing and groping her breasts.  I thought she’d be able to feel it but she couldn’t.”

“Is it small or something?” she asked.

“I’m not sure,” he said.

“You don’t know?”

“I’ve never seen it hard in the light.  When I had sex with Purrsia, the room was dark.”

“You mean you’ve never touched it or played with it?”  He shook his head.  “What sort of depraved Puritan are you?”

“I’ve never had a chance to do any of that.  When I was created I was twelve years old.  I was put into a pod and by the time I came out I was this way.  From then on I’ve lived in episodes and you know the rest.”

“And the porno’s you’ve stared in?”

“Well,” he angled his head shyly.  “When I’m in a porno I have whatever the writer gives me.  When TW write for me I have a little, spaghetti thing.  For others I’m hung like a horse.”

“Hmmm,” she blinked, confused but not confused at the same time.

He looked around the room, nervously, “Hey, Doc, you think I can tell you something?”

“You can tell me anything, Liono.”

“But this is a little, dangerous-”

“How do you mean?”

“We have to be very hush-hush about it.”  He whispered:  “Tygra said it might jinks it-”

“OK.”  She leaned closer to him.

“It’s weird that I can’t get it up.  It’s like a big tease for nothing.  That’s why I thought for a while that I might be in a-” he checked around the room again, “that I might be in a Rivero fic.”

“RD!”

“Shhh!”  You don’t want him listening-”

“You know,” she whispered and looked about the office, “when I woke up this morning, I also thought I was in an RD fic.”

“What made you think that?”

“I just had a feeling.  I got a vibe, like it was the end of the world or something.  See,” she put the pad away, “I’m not being written into fics lately and I happened to win a contest of his where I got to have my own porno.”

“Really?”  His ears perked.  “That evil, miscreant, devious, evil man writes pornos for prize contests?”

“Yeah.  I wasn’t even looking to win but, hot damned, I made post number four thousand.”

“And what’s the prize?  What’s the porno supposed to be about?”

The cheetah paused.  “You’re not going to believe this,” she began, “but it was to star in a sex-fic with you.”

Liono’s eyes widened.

“But I thought he had forgotten all about it.  He’s busy writing a couple of stories.  I didn’t think he’d have time to write a third, too.  It’s just not- human-”

“What if this is the porno you won?”

She laughed.  “Pretty messed up if it were.  I mean, what use are you if your jojo isn’t working?”

“But maybe that’s the whole idea,” he sat up.  “To get it not to work so that I’d have to come to you.  Then you make it work again.  And we have wild, roaring animal sex all over your couch!”

“I don’t know, I mean, that would be so, unprofessional,” she said, throwing Liono back across the sofa and hovering over his crotch.  “But if that’s what this story is about, then the sooner we get it to work the better, no?”  she winked, he gulped.  “Lucky for you, I have a hands-on approach!”

“Wow, you don’t waste time!”

The doctor unbuckled his shorts.  “Let’s just see here.  Are you aroused?”  he shook his head.  “Too nervous?”

“I hardly know you,” he said, his hands around his belt, “I thought we could talk some more.”

She had unbuckled his shorts and brought his covers down just a tad, just enough to let her peek into his Viagra place.   “So you’re not, excited, that way?”  He shook his head again.  “Interesting.”  She pulled off his shorts to reveal- his most erect and engorged member.

“What?  It works?”  Liono sat up in disbelief.  “But it feels normal.  It doesn’t feel funny at all!”

“Hmmm,” she salivated.  She smiled and started to touch his rod.  He moaned and panted.  “Now it’s started to feel better, isn’t it?”  He nodded.  She lowered her lips to plant a kiss on his forbidden flesh but to her surprise she did not feel his pulsating heat, his throbbing manhood.  She looked- he had shrunk!  “What?”

“Oh god!” he banged his foot down, his leg legs shaking, his chest heaving.  “More, more!”

She cupped him and watched in horror as his sack shriveled from a well-hung piece of man meat to a fold of tight skin, the contours of two, wee peas poking through.  He shivered as pangs of orgasmic furry burned up his spine.  His part fell limp over her hand and continued to shrink.  From a firm length to a soggy, droopy, flaccid sausage, it got smaller and smaller, getting so small it couldn’t shrink anymore so it retracted into his body.

He had an ingrown penis!

“Only one man could be so deviant,” she thought aloud.

“Oh doc, this is awesome!” he thrashed his head back.  “I don’t know how to repay you!”

She brushed her face up to the site of the implosion, trying to get a better picture.  Spurred by the intimate contact, he moaned and rattled.  All the while the ‘nipple’ that had become of his manhood transformed into a ‘dimple.’

“Oh, Jagga!” the feel of her breath down on his, his, hole (?), drove him to that point beyond no return.  The urge to erupt had wound up beyond bearing.

Zhie’s attention was focused on the dimple.  It tightened and- as if it were even possible- it deepened.  She-

“Ahk!”  Like a pimple popping itself, the dimple squirted a whitish, pus-like conglomeration of fluids into her unsuspecting eyes.  “Ahhh!  It burns, it burns!”  she stood and flailed her arms.  “Smithers, Smithers!”  she walked around the room blindly for the horrid creaming had forced her lids shut.  “Smithers!  A towel, a towel!”

“Yes, doctor,” he had heard her screams- the word ‘burns’ in particular- and opened the door.  His glasses were half on, his shirt was incorrectly buttoned and his fly was open.  “A towel, right away.”  He stormed into the waiting area, passing the seated pair of ThunderWolf and Shark who were too busy reading the magazines about Richard Nixon’s resignation to notice.  He returned to the scene with a dripping piece of toilet paper.  “Here, try this, we don’t have towels.”

“Argh!” she grabbed the mushy mass and brought it to her sore eyes then ran out of the room muttering something about it being a damned RD story after all.

In the ‘excitement’ it seemed that everyone had forgotten about Liono- even Liono himself.  The force of his climaxing had been so overwhelming that he had knocked himself out.

But Smithers noticed that the Lion’s shorts were down to his knees.  Of course he stepped up for a closer look.  As the lion’s arousal waned his dimpled undid itself and reformed a most erect and firm member.

“Yum!” the strange, goofy-looking, badly-animated man salivated.  “I guess it wouldn’t hurt to touch, eh?”

He walked like a zombie with his arms outstretched, his fingers a-flutter.  Like a demented Frankenstein he laughed maniacally.

The cackle alarmed the sleepy Liono, whose LFS and attention deficit disorder kept him from doing much of anything for long.  Even sleep.  He gasped in shock at the sight of that bizarre man, heaving and lumbering toward him.

“No!  Wait, wait!  This isn’t supposed to be happening!”  he stood and tried to rush out of the room but tripped over the couch and then over his shorts.

Smithers had not lost his footing at all.

“What is that?  What the hell is that?”

“You’ve almost got him, Smithers,” the voice spoke from his crotch, but that time it was not from within his pants.  His wicked-old member poked out of the parted zipper.  “I’m gonna bag that lion, I’m gonna bag him!”  Smithers’s manhood was an actual man, Mr. Burns, dressed in a blue suit, complete with arms.  It wrung its hands and whipped its tongue in eager anticipation.

“Damn you, Rivero, DAMN YOU!”

 

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